believe.
now i believe.
i believe things will be going well.
i believe the bond between us is strong enough. :)
There's always a hope, not too far away.
Monday, December 5, 2011
Friday, December 2, 2011
Childhood days :D
I don't feel like cheating, and just wanna express my actual feeling.
Perhaps it will hurt someone's feeling, perhaps i'm just that selfish...
I wanna get the greatest pain so that i can heal faster.
Perhaps this is what i want.
BUT NOT FOR OTHERS.
but still,i'm using my way to get things well.
sorry, and i don't make thing well, but the other way.
i mess up problems.
i make things worse.
i'm a typical 'chicken grandma' perhaps.
but i just can't stop myself from trying out all the methods just to find peace among people.
but instead of making things well, i seem to have just.........
i guess i'm over confident over myself, thinking that i can handle everything by myself.
i'm tired of being looked down by people around since i was young.
"aiya, she's so timid, impossible she can do that lak."
"aiya, she's just a kid in mama's hug."
"aiya, she only knows to find mama each time things go wrong."
CAN YOU JUST STOP THAT PLEASE.
IT'S HURT.
though i never mentioned, but my heart was seriously hurt.
and i couldn't remember how old was i that time...
i was being despised by people, worse off most of them were the ones who were the closest with me.
i cried in silent, i asked myself why.
thousands whys in my heart that had never had answers.
until i was 13....
i changed a lot. :)
but i was sure that i'd been changing to the worse.
YES, I HAVE BECOME MUCH MUCH BRAVER TO DATE.
but.. i don't feel like believing in HUMANS anymore.
because HOMO SAPIENS always bring hurt to me.
and all those shitty things came from the closest persons around me.
allow me to laugh at myself, just take a second to feel pity at myself.
;)
the hurts have given me too much trauma.
until form 2, i met 2 person that knew me so much well than myself and gave me so much care.
till now, i still wanna thank them so much for having given me so much attention, no hurts, but treated me with true hearts.
i was touched.
perhaps they were right.
my thinking was not suitable for my age.
it was much mature than what i should have in that age.
but if u met all those shitty problems from young, facts told me that..
YES, A PERSON WILL GROW UP FASTER, AND GET TO KNOW THINGS MUCH BETTER.
i admitted. i'm mature.
either physically or mentally i guess?
hahahaha. but i should be happy in this year.
because most of the people said i looked like a Form3.
happieee! ^^
Now, i had forgiven all the people that were used to give me the hurts.
because their presence made me understand things better and get to know the reality earlier than ever.
it's good it's goood.
hahahaha.
between beLIEve, there is always a lie.
noone never tells lies, including to the person you love.
no matter it's a positive lie or negative one, they are still LIES.
YES, I TOLD LIES.
When i was young, there're thousands of liesss to my parents. hahaha.
i think everyone would agree with this. ^^
to date, friends are soooo much important to me.
in fact, i was being bullied since i was in the kindergarten.
not wanting you guys to feel pity towards me, but for me....
i really think that those were memories to me, and if i have the chance to meet them again....
SERIOUSLY I WOULD PISS THEM OFF! xP
i came from Tadika Superkid.
i lived very far away from my kindergarten when i was small.
so i always board a van to school.
and here came a boy and a girl who were SIMPLY CUTE AND NICE.
they always borrowed books from me and then used their files to make a WALL enough to shield what they gonna do on my books.
stupidly, THEY TEAR MY BOOKS. *wtf
and stupidly, they returned to me with a broad wicked smile.
stupidly, i thought they were FRIENDS.
on reaching home, i only stupidly found out that my books..........
and i will stupidly react like this :
"eh? how come my books become like this? mama.........."
and my mummy will just help me to paste it back, no more.
hahahahaa. stupidly i also thought nothing much about it.
stupidly the next day when i passed up my homework, my teacher asked me for the reason.
i said.. "i don't know, someone in the van borrowed my book and returned me like this....."
teachers looked worried about me, but still...
everyday...the same thing happened again and again....
and STUPIDLY, i can't understand WHY ON EARTH I KEPT ON BORROWING THEM MY BOOKS FOR THEM TO TEAR APART !?
Yau Wei Ying, you are just a stupid. LOL.
but now, i know how to protect myself. no more stupidity for others to TEAR MY BOOKS ANYMORE.
GRRR xD
ahhhh, recalling everything since i was young....
i just realised...
how much had i changed.
to the better one or the worse ??
hahahaha, i don't really feel like wanna know anymore. :)
Y: i will always appreciate people who gave me their true hearts, giving me the genuine love. :)
and they will always be my friends ever. ^^
Perhaps it will hurt someone's feeling, perhaps i'm just that selfish...
I wanna get the greatest pain so that i can heal faster.
BUT NOT FOR OTHERS.
but still,i'm using my way to get things well.
sorry, and i don't make thing well, but the other way.
i mess up problems.
i make things worse.
i'm a typical 'chicken grandma' perhaps.
but i just can't stop myself from trying out all the methods just to find peace among people.
but instead of making things well, i seem to have just.........
i guess i'm over confident over myself, thinking that i can handle everything by myself.
i'm tired of being looked down by people around since i was young.
"aiya, she's so timid, impossible she can do that lak."
"aiya, she's just a kid in mama's hug."
"aiya, she only knows to find mama each time things go wrong."
CAN YOU JUST STOP THAT PLEASE.
IT'S HURT.
though i never mentioned, but my heart was seriously hurt.
and i couldn't remember how old was i that time...
i was being despised by people, worse off most of them were the ones who were the closest with me.
i cried in silent, i asked myself why.
thousands whys in my heart that had never had answers.
i changed a lot. :)
but i was sure that i'd been changing to the worse.
YES, I HAVE BECOME MUCH MUCH BRAVER TO DATE.
but.. i don't feel like believing in HUMANS anymore.
because HOMO SAPIENS always bring hurt to me.
and all those shitty things came from the closest persons around me.
allow me to laugh at myself, just take a second to feel pity at myself.
;)
the hurts have given me too much trauma.
until form 2, i met 2 person that knew me so much well than myself and gave me so much care.
till now, i still wanna thank them so much for having given me so much attention, no hurts, but treated me with true hearts.
i was touched.
my thinking was not suitable for my age.
it was much mature than what i should have in that age.
but if u met all those shitty problems from young, facts told me that..
YES, A PERSON WILL GROW UP FASTER, AND GET TO KNOW THINGS MUCH BETTER.
i admitted. i'm mature.
either physically or mentally i guess?
hahahaha. but i should be happy in this year.
because most of the people said i looked like a Form3.
happieee! ^^
Now, i had forgiven all the people that were used to give me the hurts.
because their presence made me understand things better and get to know the reality earlier than ever.
it's good it's goood.
hahahaha.
noone never tells lies, including to the person you love.
no matter it's a positive lie or negative one, they are still LIES.
YES, I TOLD LIES.
When i was young, there're thousands of liesss to my parents. hahaha.
i think everyone would agree with this. ^^
to date, friends are soooo much important to me.
in fact, i was being bullied since i was in the kindergarten.
not wanting you guys to feel pity towards me, but for me....
i really think that those were memories to me, and if i have the chance to meet them again....
SERIOUSLY I WOULD PISS THEM OFF! xP
i came from Tadika Superkid.
i lived very far away from my kindergarten when i was small.
so i always board a van to school.
and here came a boy and a girl who were SIMPLY CUTE AND NICE.
they always borrowed books from me and then used their files to make a WALL enough to shield what they gonna do on my books.
stupidly, THEY TEAR MY BOOKS. *wtf
and stupidly, they returned to me with a broad wicked smile.
stupidly, i thought they were FRIENDS.
on reaching home, i only stupidly found out that my books..........
and i will stupidly react like this :
"eh? how come my books become like this? mama.........."
and my mummy will just help me to paste it back, no more.
hahahahaa. stupidly i also thought nothing much about it.
stupidly the next day when i passed up my homework, my teacher asked me for the reason.
i said.. "i don't know, someone in the van borrowed my book and returned me like this....."
teachers looked worried about me, but still...
everyday...the same thing happened again and again....
and STUPIDLY, i can't understand WHY ON EARTH I KEPT ON BORROWING THEM MY BOOKS FOR THEM TO TEAR APART !?
Yau Wei Ying, you are just a stupid. LOL.
but now, i know how to protect myself. no more stupidity for others to TEAR MY BOOKS ANYMORE.
GRRR xD
ahhhh, recalling everything since i was young....
i just realised...
how much had i changed.
to the better one or the worse ??
hahahaha, i don't really feel like wanna know anymore. :)
Y: i will always appreciate people who gave me their true hearts, giving me the genuine love. :)
and they will always be my friends ever. ^^
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)